How To Stop Getting Jealous In A Relationship 6 Best Tips. Bible Verses On Jealousy

How to stop getting jealous in a relationship. In this article I will be providing you 6 best tips on how to stop getting jealous in a relationship. If you are suffering from jealousy issues in your life then this article is for you.

(given below are few links that might be helpful)

How to stop getting jealous in a relationship 6 best tips

Dealing with jealousy can be a tricky thing in a relationship. A little bit of it can spark your affection toward each other but too much can push you apart. We often associate it with a new relationship but even when you’re married, jealousy doesn’t necessarily just disappear. 

Jealousy is often linked with trust issues, and is something that both of you will have to work on to get under control to have a strong, and flourishing future. People ask many questions about jealousy in a relationship like how to deal with a jealous spouse? So, If it’s your husband or wife who is jealous, try to approach the situation using the following tips on how to cure jealousy in a  relationship.

“A little jealousy in a relationship is good, its nice to know that someone is afraid to loose you”

Overcoming Unwanted Intrusive Thoughts: A CBT-Based Guide to Getting Over Frightening, Obsessive, or Disturbing Thoughts  therapist recommended

1. Listen to them

If you’re feeling attacked by your spouse because they’re jealous, it can be difficult not to react and become defensive even if their accusations are false. Ignoring them won’t make the issue go away. Jealousy comes from a place of fear, and lack of self-worth, and by listening to your spouse and encouraging them to talk through their feelings.

By doing this you’re more likely to find the real heart of the issue, whether or not you agree with your partner’s feelings their emotions are valid to a certain degree. You should give each other the respect of being heard. 

Show them that you do care, and are taking their feelings seriously, and want to work on this together. Talking about what provoked their reaction and past experiences where these feelings of insecurity stem from. It will give you both a better understanding of the situation. With this knowledge you can get better, avoid triggers, and prevent similar situations in the future.

HOW TO CONTROL YOUR ANGER BEFORE IT CONTROLS YOU

2. Get to the root of it

Jealousy can often be traced back to a hurtful experience in someone’s past. It can be a defense mechanism to try to prevent themselves from being in the same difficult position again. Your spouse might have been cheated on in a past relationship. Causing them to jump to the worst conclusion about where your loyalties lie when things are calm and friendly between you, i.e not during a jealous outburst.

Take the opportunity to speak to your partner about whether jealousy has always been a theme in their relationships, and see if it can be linked back to anyone. Even by looking back to find the root of the problem, you might find that your partner’s reactions are less to do with your relationship. More to do with a past hurt that they’ve never recovered from.

With this information, you and your partner will now have a starting point to work from. When addressing their issues with jealousy you’ll both now have a better understanding of what causes their jealousy, and the ability to preempt situations where your partner could be triggered. This is also one of the best method in our topic of “how to stop getting jealous in a relationship with 6 best tips”.

“Problems are like plants; you`ve got to get to the roots in order to prevent them from popping up again”

Insecure in Love: How Anxious Attachment Can Make You Feel Jealous, Needy, and Worried and What You Can Do About It  therapist recommended

3. Don’t give them a reason to be jealous

It sounds simple but if you know your partner gets jealous easily don’t make the situation worse. You won’t get it right all the time, but make sure you put that extra effort into reassuring them of your commitment. This could make all the difference in how secure they feel with you. Check-in with them if you go out for the night without them. 

Make sure they know, it’s them that you can’t wait to see when you’re home, small actions like this help to stop your spouse from overthinking. 

We’re jumping to the worst conclusions when they haven’t heard from you. It might seem like you’re reassuring them a lot at first, but the more comfortable they feel the more trusting they’ll become of your sincerity.

Relationship OCD: A CBT-Based Guide to Move Beyond Obsessive Doubt, Anxiety, and Fear of Commitment in Romantic Relationships  therapist recommended

4. Don’t let things escalate

In our topic of “how to stop getting jealous in a relationship with 6 best tips” escalating things comes fourth. Their accusations might be entirely unfair, you’ll feel attacked, and defensive but matching them in anger will only make the situation worse. Defending yourself is not what your spouse wants to hear, when they’ve got themselves into an emotional state thinking you’ve been unfaithful.

If they’re at the point of accusing you, anything you say to contradict them will only make it worse, and they’ll see it as you defending your actions.

No one ever wins a fight, it’s always a lose-lose situation where the both of you get hurt. If tensions are beginning to rise and get heated take the opportunity to calmly tell them that you care about them and acknowledge their feelings.

If the situation is still tense, and your spouse doesn’t want to listen suggest you both take some time to calm down before coming back to talk about what made them so upset. You can’t fight fire with fire. So, make sure you cool down the situation before you work to resolve it.

“Between an uncontrolled escalation and passivity, there is a demanding road of responsibility that we must follow”

5. Be patient

Things aren’t going to change overnight. If your spouse is naturally a jealous person. This is ingrained behavior that will take time to change. You will both still get things wrong, and jealousy will continue to be present in your marriage even if you have agreed to work to overcome it.

It’s how much of a problem you both let it become that matters. Be patient with your partner, and recognize if changes are being made, not how big those changes are. Put productive steps in place to work on together, perhaps choosing to show more affection toward each other, spending more quality time together, or making the effort to be in more contact.

It’s a learning curve that both of you will have to go through. It isn’t something that can be fixed immediately. Being patient is not only important in main topic on how to stop being jealous in relationship with 6 best tips, but it is also very important in everyone`s daily life. So, please be patient, recognize the areas that are beginning to get better, and celebrate how far you’ve come not how far you have to go.

Fatal Jealousy: The True Story of a Doomed Romance, a Singular Obsession, and a Quadruple Murder

6. Suggest therapy

As much as you want to help your partner, and try to find a solution between you, sometimes behavior such as severe is set too deep for either of you to manage on your own. No one has an instruction manual for a marriage, and we aren’t trained to deal with the problems that crop up.

We can only do the best that we can, if your partner e.g jealous husband or jealous wife, is really struggling with getting their jealousy under control. You aren’t sure what to do about it. There are many jealousy therapy, and insecurity available these days, suggest they see a therapist or that you go to jealousy counseling or couples counseling together.

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Therapists are trained for situations like controlling toxic jealousy. They know the right questions to ask, and how to stop discussions escalating into an argument. They can provide you the guidance on how to handle difficult situations when jealousy is becoming an issue, how to avoid being jealous, and stop it before it gets worse.

(Don`t be shy)

Seeking help doesn’t mean you can’t handle your own relationship, it shows a commitment to making things work and bettering yourself. Please don’t shy away from asking for help or let pride or embarrassment stand in the way of a happy future.

So, we discussed about how to stop getting jealous in a relationship along with 6 best tips. Believe me my friends, you can`t go wrong by following the above given tips.

“There is no true love without jealousy”

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Bible verses on jealousy

As there are many verses on jealousy in Bible. Few are listed below.

• A sound heart is the life of the flesh, but envy the rottenness of the bones. (Proverbs 14:30 KJV)

• From where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there will be disorder and every vile practice. (James 3:16)

• Let us behave properly as in the day, not in carousing and drunkenness, not in sexual promiscuity and sensuality, not in strife and jealousy. (Romans 13:13)

• For where envying and strife is, there is confusion and every evil work. (James 3:16 KJV )

• Let not thine heart envy sinners; but be thou in the fear of the Lord all the day long. (Proverbs 23:17 KJV)

• For jealousy is the rage of a man: therefore he will not spare in the day of vengeance. (Proverbs 6:34 KJV)

• Wraith is cruel, and anger is outrageous; but who is able to stand envy? (Proverbs 27:4 KJV)

• Or when the spirit of jealousy cometh upon him, and he be jealous over his wife, and shall set the woman before the Lord, and the priest shall execute upon her all this law. (Numbers 5:30 KJV)

• Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant. (Corinthians 13:4)
• Slay the green eyed monster. (Proverbs 14:30)

How Jealousy Distorts Your Thinking

How would you feel if you thought your sibling was your parent’s favorite child? Or if you suspected your partner had fallen in love with somebody else? Jealousy in a relationship is most often an indication of insecurity. Almost everyone has experienced a time when they felt jealous. 

Jealousy and Envy: New Views about Two Powerful Feelings (Psychoanalytic Inquiry Book Series)

(Green eyed monster)

Feeling a little jealousy may be harmless, but it can also be a powerful emotion that can take complete control over its subjects. Today we will take a closer look into the jealousy psychology to learn how to tame this green-eyed monster, how to deal with jealousy and insecurity in a relationship, and jealousy issues.

Jealousy is a deeply upsetting feeling that often arises in any relationship, and is a big threat to a valued relationship. It is a constellation of emotions, ranging from fear of loss and anxiety to anger, sadness, and humiliation. Jealousy is commonly seen among siblings, in friendships, in romantic relationships, and in the marriage too. Evolutionary psychologists have suggested that jealousy evolved to protect our social bonds.

“Jealousy comes from counting other`s blessings instead of your own”

So, its important to realize that jealousy itself is a normal reaction, and not something we should feel ashamed about. It’s a wake-up call when there’s a danger, forcing us to take steps to preserve a valued relationship. But “jealousy also arises in imagined scenarios and serves no real purpose” That’s where problems tend to start. Jealousy throws us into several cognitive mistakes:

1. Mind-reading.
That’s when you think “she is interested in him,” without really having evidence for it. 

2. Personalizing.
This is when you interpret everything about yourself–for example, you think your partner is watching TV because they are no longer interested in you. 

3. Fortune-telling.
That’s when you predict the future actions of your partner and for example, imagine them leaving you. You may be the most confident, and secure person in the world, and still feel jealous.  

Try to dial down the immediate stress caused by jealousy

Write down your feelings. Pay attention to how jealousy makes you feel: do you feel a tightening in your chest? Focus on where in your body you feel different. This can help you calm down and become able to think clearly.

Identify your cognitive pitfalls

Stay away from mind-reading, personalizing or fortune-telling. Consider the counter-evidence. Think of the good times you’ve had with your partner and the plans you have for the future together. This practice can put you in a positive emotional state, and reduce your focus on only the bad parts of a relationship.

Identify the roots of your fears

Figuring out what fuels your jealousy will help you better deal with it. It’s okay to feel jealous sometimes, but there’s a difference between controlling it, and letting it control you. Remember that emotions pass, so with awareness, and practice you’ll be able to let go of any that are no longer serving you, sooner.

Fight Your Fears: Trusting God’s Character and Promises When You Are Afraid

How Does A Jealous Person Act In A Friendship?

I will share with you how does a jealous person act. I will concentrate more on the friendships, and I’m gonna give you five signs that your friend might be jealous of you. 

1. They are imitating you

Yes, they are trying to talk like you, act like you, look like you. They start to lose themselves in order to be like you. So the reason it is a little bit dangerous to have a friend like that. It’s because we are very insecure, and we are not happy with themselves. Therefore they try, and copy. If you do like a friend that you have a good idea would be to direct that person to words with self love.

“A jealous close friend is worse than a friendly hidden enemy”

So they start to become more confident, and they start to believe in themselves, and they start more comfortable in their own skin, in their own body, in their own mind.

2. If he or she is be letting your success

For example that person who doesn’t clap when you succeed, it’s the one to watch out for. The person who gives you kind of breadcrumb compliments for your success, who literally like it brings it in but doesn’t really acknowledge it that’s a huge sign that he or she might be very jealous of you.

3. A jealous person will love you when you fail

When you fail in your studies, when you fail at your relationship, when you fail in life and you don’t succeed, a jealous person will always be there for you supporting you hundred and fifty percent. You know why? because your success makes them very insecure. And if you and your friend came from the same boat, and you are doing better than them they simply cannot accept that.

4. They tell you that you got lucky

When you achieve your goals and ambitions, doesn’t matter how much hard work you put in, how much determination you put in, how much blood you leaked out, that person will still tell you that you just got lucky. And they will have all the reasoning behind your luck. They will make sure to criticize your every move, and they will totally ignore your hard work, and skills. They will just put it all on your luck.

5. They will consciously, they will on purpose give you bad advice so you would fail

They will make sure that their advice to you sounds very genuine, and that you would follow it. Once you will fail then they give you this bad advice that we’re gonna be your best friend. Being there for you, and supporting you hundred and fifty percent when you fail.

So, those were the five signs on how to spot a jealous person. My friends, have a look around, you might have people who share these qualities, and I know I definitely had some in the past.

How to Win Friends & Influence People

How to Deal With Jealousy In Your Marriage, 7 Best Ways

You probably won’t be surprised to hear that jealousy is an issue for many, many married couples. In fact, a recent study of Canadian marriage counselors found that one third of all couples who attended counseling cited jealousy as a primary cause of their marriage problems.

After giving you advice on how to stop getting jealous in a relationship with 6 best tips. Let’s talk about some more ways you can keep jealousy issues in check, and avoid it from damaging your marriage.

Communication in Marriage: Learn How to Rescue the Couple Relationship Without Fighting with Your Spouse

1. Irrational jealousy

This kind of jealousy that’s really bad news for any relationship. This kind of jealousy can have a lot of different causes, usually related to insecurity of low self-esteem. I’m not going to go into the psychology behind it, but it’s important to note that most people who develop jealousy issues, often have underlying insecurities resulting from past experiences.

Whatever the cause may be, if you are the person who struggles with jealousy issues, then you have the ability to make changes to your behavior that will put these problems to rest.

2. Recognize that, in most cases, your feelings of jealousy are irrational

In other words, they’re unwarranted feelings. Unless your spouse has actually admitted to infidelity, or you’ve caught them in the act, then your jealousy is irrational. Recognize that your jealous feelings aren’t based on reality. They’re stemming from underlying insecurities and not from actual behaviors of your spouse. Once you’ve accepted that you’re feeling jealous for no good reason, then it can be a bit easier to control those feelings, and stop yourself from acting on them.

“At least you recognize it as irrational. Jealousy will tear a relationship apart quicker than anything”

Every time you feel jealous about something for instance, when your spouse is texting someone of the opposite sex you haven’t met, remind yourself that your jealousy is baseless, and irrational. You’ve probably texted someone of the opposite sex recently too, right? And I’m guess it wasn’t because you were secretly having an affair with that person.

The same is almost certainly true for your spouse, so there’s absolutely no reason to think that they’re doing anything shady or cheating on you. Until you have clear evidence that proves otherwise, you must remind yourself that all feelings of jealousy are irrational and unwarranted.

3. Realizing that your feelings of jealousy are actually really dumb

This is an important step in the right direction, but the most important step is what you do next. No matter how intense your feelings of jealousy are, you absolutely must internalize them and avoid acting on them. Do whatever it takes to keep yourself from acting on jealous feelings.

Literally bite your tongue, tell a friend in confidence, write down your feelings in a private diary. It really doesn’t matter, as long as you’re not doing something destructive as a result of your jealousy.

Again, when jealousy hits, remind yourself that these emotions you’re feeling are irrational, and that acting on them will damage your marriage.

4. Have a mature, civilized discussion about jealousy with your partner

There are often things you can both do to help keep any jealousy issues in check. Perhaps you get jealous when your spouse goes out with coworkers every Friday night, for example. Instead of getting angry, and trying to stop your partner from attending these work get-togethers, you can share your feelings with your spouse, and ask if you can tag along one Friday to help alleviate your concerns.

Make sure your spouse knows that you understand the irrational nature of your jealous feelings, and they’ll likely be willing to take steps to help you reign in those emotions.

5. Building a strong level of trust

Yes, building a strong level of trust between you and your partner is very important in any marriage, and it’s also extremely important to controlling jealousy issues, as you might imagine.

6. What to do if your partner is the one who struggles with jealousy issues

If you have a jealous spouse, then the first thing to do is to assess whether or not you’re doing something that’s causing these feelings. Are you an extremely private person, for example, who prefers to keep emails, and text messages confidential from your spouse? Or do you avoid checking in with your spouse when you’re out of town on business?

There’s a number of possibilities. So, take a good hard look at your own behaviors, and try to identify things you might be doing or saying that could be contributing to your partner’s jealousy. Then, talk with them about these issues, and consider making changes to help alleviate your spouse’s concerns.

(Stop that activity)

Even if you feel like you’re not doing anything wrong, consider stopping that activity temporarily to show your commitment to the marriage, and your partner’s feelings. Explain to your spouse that you feel like their jealousy is unwarranted. But that you’re willing to take a break from whatever things you’re doing that are causing the jealousy if it will help.

“Call me selfish call me jealous. But you are one of the blessings that I don’t want to share with anyone”

You don’t have to back down, and let your partner control your life, and prevent you from doing things that you enjoy, but being willing to compromise, even temporarily, can help to build trust and prove your commitment.

7. Speaking of proving commitment

It can also help to really show your love, and devotion to your spouse through words, and actions. By regularly telling your spouse how much you love them, complimenting him or her occasionally. Also explaining how much he or she means to you, you can help to eliminate some of your partner’s insecurities. This kind of thing is good practice in any marriage, regardless of jealousy issues. It’s especially important if your partner is struggling with an irrational jealousy problem.

Finally, if jealousy continues to be an issue for either you or your partner, consider getting some guidance from a marriage coach.

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The difference between healthy jealousy and unhealthy jealousy

Above we discussed about how to stop being jealous in a relationship and friendship along with 6 best tips. But do you know there is also a healthy jealousy? yes there is. A healthy jealousy stems from a sincere care, and commitment to a relationship.

This is the kind of completely natural jealousy that we all suffer from occasional. It’s not something you should be worried about. Recognize that it’s perfectly normal to feel a jolt of jealousy when you see your partner laughing, and enjoying a conversation with someone of the opposite sex.

(Guarding our territory)

We feel these kind of emotions because we’re invested in the relationship with our partners. We are essentially ‘guarding our territory’. It’s when people begin to act on these emotions, or when jealousy becomes irrational, that things move into the ‘unhealthy’ sphere.

Irrational jealousy is more serious and tends to be a chronic issue that can erode the fabric of a marriage.

Jealousy Through CBT: Create Healthy Relationships with Cognitive Behavioral Therapy: From Anxiety and Insecurity to Trust and Peace of Mind 

The Jealousy Workbook: Exercises and Insights for Managing Open Relationships

Conclusion

So firstly, please do not expect miracles to occur overnight or in just a few days, it will take some time. Secondly, try to remember those moments when you were badly in love with your partner before you got married to each other. Try to think about the promises you made that whatever trouble comes in life, that we will help each other, and no one can come between us.

I hope I have cleared all the important points of our main topic about “how to stop getting jealous in a relationship with 6 best tips, and Bible verses on jealousy”. If you have any questions please comment below. Enjoy your life.

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